Gain his ear
by tayrn24
Summary: What transpired after Dougal and Jamie left Leoch having been banished by Colum in ep10 , in the series. What did they do? Where did they go? And what happened there? Added some laughs, some heat, 'obviously' some whores and also answered a couple of unanswered questions from the show and books (well, according to me:)
1. Chapter 1

**Gain his ear:  
**

* * *

Jamie woke when the sun's rays hit his eyes so brutally.  
He sat abruptly, feeling cold, wet, hungry and most of all hard.

Damn, ever since they married it was becoming an almost everyday occurrence for him to wake up so.

Only difference was that she wasna here to help him wi' such things.

He had only now discovered the joy of the flash and had received the gift of doing so with the most magnificent creature he had e'er seen, only to have it ripped from his grasp, verra rudely and mercilessly.

Once by his own wife, for his mishandling of her (as accordance to her beliefs)  
and a second time, a trice, after he finally bridged his way back to bliss,  
ho Lord, such bliss,  
by his unfortunate positioning between "ye are to be laird" and "ye'll die before ye'd be laird" clot heids.

He shielded his eyes from the monstrousness of the light's ray, with one hand, while rubbing his face and stubble to wake with the other.

He took a deep breath through his nose, only to wince and phew at the smell of him.

Thank the all -mighty she wasna here!  
She wouldna come near him smelling as he did.

And Jamie had enough in his life to ever want her to shy away and reject him again, for whatever reason.

Never again, he decided when he woke her by taking his mouth in between those white, smooth, shivering thighs.  
Not ever, he swore, as she cried loudly thumping her hand on the headboard, unable to take breath.

Two mornings ago, which seemed to him, now, as two life time's ago.

"Merde" he expressed his feelings.  
The reminder of that morning only made him grow firmer.

"Fine, fine I hear ye" he said to the part of him that made it clear, he was going nowhere, especially when all he could think 'obout was her.

Her skin, her hands, her mouth, her eyes, the way she looked at him wi' gloom and heavy-heartedness when he separated from her.  
Did he manage to touch said heart? He asked wishfully to the heavens.

She was sad to see him go, this much was clear.  
He shouldna rejoice o' it, nay when he could feel his own misery for ever being more than ten feet away from her.  
But it spoke of her feeling to him and that… that he would take in whatever way she saw fit to reveal it.

"Come back to me James Fraser" she said pleading his return to her.  
If she would ha' cried 'oot his name only once more, he would have surely hurdled himself off the damn horse and rash to her arms again, not able to ever let her go.

He leaned on the wall where he slept, looked around to see no one was in sight and inched up his kilt.

He brought forth the memories of touching her for the first time, kissing her, removing her dress, touching her skin and breast, being inside her.  
But it was those eyes that made him spill himself.  
Those eyes which held her hurt and sorrow at his departure.

Will ye ever love me, mo nighean donn?  
Will ye be mine as I return to ye?  
And will ye hold me in your arms and ask me to never leave again?

"Please do Sassenach, please do" he said as he unraveled at the end.

When he had himself in clear mind again, he glided himself up along the stone, cold wall of the stable where he slept, at the second brothel Dougal made arrangement for them to stop at.

Bleeding aching Jesus Christ. In a time of grief and loss o' lover, child and wife, the man seemed to only regard his own cock as the solution.

Jamie kent he said, quite vehemently, he willna call upon such establishments, which seemed to be where his uncle chose to lament so thoroughly.  
He dinna want to see or touch none but her, but the smell of him and his stomach had vetoed such resolves and declared of other needs and desires than just her.  
God damn stinking, traitors.

So he found himself wryly coming closer to the kittle hoosie in pursuit only of a wash basin with some warm water, a decent mug of ale and some porridge, nay more!

"I ken I said it dinna matter" he spoke to the ether as he walked closer to that blue door that screened many women that were not her.  
"That I would love ye enough for us both, only-  
Christ Sassenach, ye ha' so much love in ye, anyone can see it.  
And such passion that will sear the world, if it be all ignited"  
He sighed deeply  
"Aye I ken what I said before. But that was **BEFORE!** "  
He almost berated her now  
"Before those moments. Those moments ye invited me to see into your soul, before those moments ye were mine and with me, those moments when ye laughed whole-heartedly, when ye touched, when ye allowed for me to touch ye back"

He slid quickly aside to prevent himself being sodden by a naked lass emptying a chamber pot from one of the windows.

"Nay lass, less o' ye is no longer enough. I want it all now.  
Will ye ever give it to me?"  
He asked the cold pale skies, as he averted his gaze from the spill.

He sighed again and let his shoulders drop wi' his gaze.  
No answer will come to him now and certainly no here.

There was a moment one night, when she turned to him in sleep, found a spot on his chest, cradled her heid there, burrowing into him as if she was a winter mole finding herself a protective spot inside the ground.

That was what her face reflected.  
Warmth, comfort, protection.

Her curls cascaded on his form, all fanning on his skin, to remind him that although they were a whorl of freedom, that stood on ends at times.  
They were soft as silk;  
and if he touched them, they seem to melt into his skin, as warm honey would, if it be glazed on warm fresh bread, same color as weel.  
Her hand came to lie on his chest, still fully asleep and her lips softly skimmed his nipple, which became hard in a matter of seconds.  
He dinna dare move or breathe, as to no wake her or ha' her leave such position.  
It felt like-

?~?~?~?

"Good morrow and what ha' we here?" asked a breast exposed woman as he closed the door behind him "We no usually get callers in this time o' the morning, ye do ha' crown dunna ye? Ye nay a beggar?"

"Good marrow" he replied ignoring her words and tone, by the sight of him he couldna fault her.  
"Your servant ma'am" he bowed lightly.  
"A gentleman then?" she said, her face shocked with surprise.  
Weel, as he said the look and smell of him.

"Ye be wanting Edina then," she said regaining her composure "she does the dandy ones. Though she doesna take it up the arse or swallows what comes 'oot, ye hear?"  
Jamie choked on his own breath.  
"Aye, a bit of a dandy herself if ye ask me," the woman said thinking he was appalled by Edina's haughty and not by her words "But there ye ha' it.  
If this be your pleasure, though, Might I interest ye wi' one that does? I think-" she paused to listen a moment and Jamie heard a harsh cry from the second floor, fallowed by a deep moan.  
"Aye, Muriel be done by now, for proper coin wi' that one and ye could put it anywhere ye'd like"

"No" Jamie exclaimed in distress when he saw her about to call out for the lady.  
"Water, food" he blurted, forgetting how to compose full-length sentence.

Mother of God, this much straight up crudeness so early in the morning did leave a man wi'-

?~?~?~?~?

"What's amiss then?" another woman appeared from a fancy side door to his right.  
This one was at least fully dressed, thank the Lord for small blessings, and was looking much milder and delicate than is current companion.  
But by no means less sharp.  
As a razor, Jamie concluded as she surveyed and scrutinized him with brown hawk honey eyes, as to make him feel naked and exposed himself and this wi'oot him even moving or speaking.  
Could he no catch a break?

"I" was all he could come up with.  
"Food, wash" he finally said recalling.

"Ye're the one that slept at my stables, are ye not?"  
He nodded.  
When she spoke, he could hear she had an accent of some kind, but could not quite put his mind as from where.

"Jamaica, that is where I'm from, although my father was French, but my mother black" she said and he wondered how she could possible ken his mind.

She turned to the lass that greeted him.  
"Shona, how many times must we repeat this? Ye dunna corner a man at the door, ye dunna offer service unless asked and ye dunna…."  
"Aye, aye I ken, ye dunna yell" Shona answered rolling her eyes, apparently she was being told that many times.

"I was going to say, tell a man's preference outside a closed door. Whatever he seeks shell be shared between him and ye in private. Well comprendre?  
Silencieux is what determines if a whore is for a night or a whore is for a life.  
Proper gold is earned with the latter not the foremost are we clear?"

Shona nodded, clearly irritated at being reprimanded. Yet again.

"But of course, we also nay scream in my establishment, ye leave that for the clients n'est- ce pas?" the woman, which was clearly the Madam of this residence, snapped a bit angrily.

"Now ye are with Dougal than?" she finally returned to acknowledge Jamie.  
He dinna even need to nod again, as she inclined her heid for him to fallow, pointing with the fan she held to a door across what seemed to be the salon of the establishment, saying  
"come".

Jamie followed mesmerized and bewildered all at the same time.

As they entered the room, she closed the door behind them and to his relief he saw there was a full sized bath standing at the north corner of it and nay a bed.

"Oui, I kent your mind." she said seeing his relaxation "and so does your uncle" a smile spread on her lips "Although he did ask me to give it my all and get ye 'settled' with a lass once ye would come and have your fill of food." She pointed with her fan again  
"I added the bath once I saw the look of ye".  
"I thank ye" Jamie replied, trying to stir from his stupor.

"Your servant ma'am" he bowed lightly.  
"Although whatever Dougal paid ye to ha' me 'settled'" he said regaining his self-possession and straightening "I'll double it, if ye just be obliged to bring me some food and drink in here and lock the door wi' me within, alone, awaiting 'till he is done and good to leave"

"Might take him a while" she grinned knowingly "Once he rises he usually takes them by the three's"  
"By the what?" Jamie gawped.  
"Three girls at a time" she clarified, looking so undisturbed by this fact "although something must be on his mind by the way he doubled his efforts last night and took five o'my best girls"  
"FIVE?!" Jamie shamefully squeaked.  
"Dunno be worrit, he was only served by two of them. Made the other three play for him while he did so, though"

Jamie could actually feel his eyes threaten to pop from their sockets.  
"This surprises ye?" she queried, now looking surprised at his reaction.

"I thought ye said discretion is what makes a… ye ken what ye said.." he said trying to repel any further revelations regarding his own uncle's habits behind closed doors.  
Christ, he lived under the man's roof as a child. Such things were as if one would think of his own father-

Jamie coughed, choking and stuffing that thought deep, deep within himself, where he could never find it again.

"Your uncle tastes and appetites are well known and he likes it so." she said in such a way that made Jamie ponder if there was ever a question this woman dinna ken how to answer.  
"And as I always say 'the client is always right'. If he wishes all men to ken his virility, I be the first to scream it all through the streets, or, at least, ask my girls to do so" she cocked an eyebrow at him "Your uncle pays very well"  
"Aye, aye." Jamie said understanding her meaning and was already extracting coins from his sporran.

"Fine then," she said taking the coins, but nay even looking at their worth "ye bath here; I'll see that a fresh shirt and breeches will be brought for ye.  
For the food, though, you will be joining me at my table, n'est- ce pas?"

This was no request and Jamie kent it.  
"Of course" he nodded inclining his heid in thanks and smiling kindly.

"Bien" she smiled back at getting her way and Jamie wondered did she ever no?

"Now shell I call for someone for ye?" she asked as she was about to take her leave.  
"What?" he asked baffled.

"Such things are included if one pays for a bath" she explained "one receives Shirley or Willamina to have 'it' washed properly"  
"Have what wash?" he asked, then caught on and declared "No! no need ye can tell Shirley and Willamina and Shona and anyone else to take the morning off and off of my 'it' as far as I'm concerned, if ye please" then he added with another cordial bow "But I thank ye kindly, truly"

"Aye, I figured as such, with you anyway" she said half out the door.  
"I dinna fallow your meaning?" he asked at the last second, wondering what else was known to her of him.

"Come join me at my table, we will talk then" she smiled mysteriously and was out the door before anything else will be revealed.


	2. Chapter 2

As promised a shirt and breeks appeared,  
They came wi' a lass that walked in, while he was bathing, naked, having only a bar of soap for concealment purposes.

The lass, put down the clothes on a near stool, stood to face him with her arms on her hips, stared for a while at his-  
sighed and said  
"Too bad, ye look as if ye could ha' been fun" ,sighed again wi' regret,  
"your clothes are drying on the ropes by the yard" she added  
and was 'oot the door.

?~?~?~?~

Once decent, Jamie left the room;  
hardly closing the door behind him, another woman wiggled her hand to the crook of his arm and guided him to a table filled with-

Apple tarts, fresh baked bread frosted wi' butter and powdered sugar, lemon soufflés, custards, butter-yeast-leavened cakes, puddings and an array of cheeses.

Jamie as failed to see such a spread of luscious, luxurious, decadence, since his days spent at his uncle's Jared house and even then only on special engagements when a new wine was showcased.

The young lady ,who performed as his escort, gestured for him to sit, which he did, feeling dumbfounded and embarrassed.

"Taing dhut" he remembered to thank her courteously at the very last second before she walked away, leaving him to himself.

He was starving and this was quite a sight to torment a famished man wi', but he dinna dare touch the food.  
This couldna all be for him, could it?  
How much did he give the Madam? Ho dear Lord, how much did Dougal? 

Said Madam was now walking in his direction wi' another lass, who was obviously receiving her orders and guidelines.  
Those were being accepted wi' all the severity of a subordinate being distributed his orders by a General officer at the eve of battle.

"No, that is no the way" said the Madam "He has already shown you, you are at his confidence, he asked for no girl but you for the last four visits.  
All that needs to be done now, is for you to relax him further, you Ken how" she cocked an eyebrow at the lass "and when he is close, replace your mouth with your hand and ask him all you need to know" she ordered using her fan "And Elinor?"  
"Aye ma'am?" Elinor queried.  
"Make sure you ask the questions in a way he can answer in short. If done right ye may get all he has, but he will only have a breath for a few words to give it to ye"  
"Aye ma'am" said Elinor compliantly.

"Good. Keep it simple and direct, but always remember- that he is the one, the best and the only.  
Se dépecher, do not keep him waiting"  
"Of course ma'am" the lass answered, started to walk and then pivot back to the Madam "'tis only these three question this time or…?"  
"What do ye mean?" the Madam frowned.  
"When he gave me the things to ask last night, Dougal said to come and see him afore, for he might ha' more"  
"Well if Dougal wanted **more** , he should have been prepared to rise himself at dawn, when the gentleman comes. You canna keep him waiting!  
He has a regiment to go back to and he must do so before they notice him gone.  
So go and make him no regret taking the risk and coming to you, allons-y, vite" she hissed at the lass, which hurriedly disappeared through one of the doors in the second floor.

"Whores as spies, what a notion" said a smiling Jamie as she joined him at the table.

"Mais no, this willna do" she said sitting down and surveying the table.  
She called out to an opening near them that was screened by a curtain, but still kept her tone mellow and sweet as she ordered Shona prior to this.  
"Shirley, there is no wine. Why is there no wine on my table? Do we treat our men as such?"

"I beg your pardon ma'am-" Jamie tried to say that this was no needed, that this was too much, but she stopped his words.

"Niall. That is what you call me, Niall. In my home, all know each other by their given name and all are family".

"And all are royal, as I see from this" he gestured to all the opulence before them.  
That was intensified now with a verra fine looking decanter of wine, which was red and clear as blood rubies, brought on by Shirley and carried with it the lavish bouquet of fruity scent.

"But of course" said Niall, motioning for the wine to be poured  
"You give your family the best and so it goes both ways" she said, half ordering him wi' her eyes, to eat and drink.  
He certainty needed no further prompting and commence devouring everything in sight.

"Besides" she added, smiling to herself at the sight of him  
"Decadence leads to decadence. If one treats himself to the best, one will want more of the best.  
I have seen many men only come here for food or drink with their friends and find themselves with one of my girls; only because they want to continue indulging themselves to more of the finer things in life"

Jamie considered the risk of the trap she placed before him.  
But the food only made him sorry his wife wasn't here to taste the marvels with him, so he continued to satisfy his hunger for food and nay for the lassies, unafraid.

"I must say ma'a- I mean Niall" Jamie corrected himself seeing her expression "You are the smartest…" he searched for the proper word.  
"Whore" she interjected helpfully.  
"Nay lass, ye are no mere whore" he said wholeheartedly "ye are-"  
He failed again to come up with a word for the phenomenon that sat before him.  
This was a revelation to him, he so rarely found himself wi' no words.  
"I dinna ken, yet, quite what ye are, but ye are something verra exceptional and impressive to be sure" he said and meant every word.

"If one was to have a future, one has to build it for his own" she said believing his sincerity and relishing in the adulation, perhaps she wasna used to man acknowledging her mind and tongue's worth.

Jamie was learning quite a lot of how much worth can a woman truly possess.  
Especially being married to nay a simpleton herself, even by the standards of the lady that sat before him.

"I" Niall waved her hand to display the brothel "This is mine. And so I invest more than the common whore in it" she said wi' pride "It is my craft, my art.  
When I opened this place I decided that I will learn all there Is to learn of matters of the heart and flesh and I will bring any man to his knees and make him thank me for it" she ended wi' a commanding grin, knowing she accomplished just that.

"And the spying game? How did that endeavor come to play?" Jamie requested to know, quite curious to his surprise.  
"What's good enough for the queen of England, should be good enough for the Scots.  
Of course it was your own queen which was the first to use such tactics and employ ladies to extract information using… shell we call it, womanly 'charms'.  
I am only following the greats before me"

"Aren't ye the clever hen" Jamie said wi' a smile.  
"Ye need eyes no brain for such matters. Our little piece of land is in chaos" she said leaning to him as if they shared secrets now.  
"The winds whisper of war coming" she continued to smile as if such a thing dinna bother her the slightest "and soon a whore might find the knowing of the whispers from ones mouth to be more precious then what comes out of his cock"

"So Dougal nay comes here for the bedding" Jamie deduced.  
"Ho no, the man comes for the bedding" she leaned back, cocking her eyebrow at him "As I said I am the **best** in my craft"  
She grinned from ear to ear, verra pleased and sure of herself.  
"But once I kent his stature and beliefs, I saw some trade can be made. Opportunities that will be beneficial for both parties"

Jamie could actually admire all the webs she spun; he should remember how it's done. 

"So after the man with the healthy appetite, settles all that is in his breeches" she carried on "he comes to sit wi' me at my table and ask to Ken who is new to come, who might be leaving and who comes wi' new words in his head that might help a Scot see more than what goes on in his little piece of land, or even further than his country borders"  
"And ye supply all that?" Jamie felt himself rapt.  
"I might" she said craftily with a smirk "and you young laird?"  
Jamie dinna even doubt from whom she got that information from.  
She did employ five spies to handle a mere man last night.  
He would be shocked if she dinna hold all that ever crossed Dougal's mind since childbirth.

"Do ye find yourself of need of such services I offer, my dear, Lord Broch Tuarach?"  
"Nay" he smiled, realizing now the reason for her kindness to him.  
He was a future investment.  
"I hold no thought for political aspiration myself" he said.

And yet he kept finding himself trapped and forced to play a part in this bloody rebellion, he added to himself, wondering what's to come.

But then another thought came to him.  
"Did ye tell Dougal when the Duke of Sandringham first arrived to this land?"

She silenced.  
He pulled the crown he had from his sporran and after a few more times of doing so, she sighed, gathered her coins and said  
"I suppose that part of the telling will do nay harm"

Ostensibly a smart whore kens who to keep loyalty to.  
But also kens when and how much she can stray from it.

"Aye I did" she disclosed "Long ago, I told him he be smart to invite a new comer by the name of Sandringham to his abode".  
"And how did ye come to think or know of such a man?" Jamie enquired making his sporran much lighter yet again "His lordship as it is known is nay quite fond of your fine gender, no offence of course"  
"Aye, but his personal varlet is" she smirked shrewdly "and he has a soft heart and a none so soft other part for Charlotte over there" 

Jamie looked up at where she pointed and gasped, scared for a moment, thinking he was seeing Laoghaire sitting on a stool near the counter.  
But it wasn't, thank the Lord, only a verra, verra close resemblance.

"Might of had one like her in his past, they usually chose such matters according to that" Niall continued to educate him "Man like to swive those they had or desired to have and couldn't" she shrugged her shoulders accepting the truths that men held and said "Or if they did have them, they like to do to us the things they weren't allowed to do to the other"

She stopped with the schooling and narrowed her eyes at him.  
"And ye?" she now requested information from him.

"What?" he said, startled into dumbfoundedness and found himself disconcerted at being read by what seemed to be a master of men's ways.  
"Me? No lass I told ye-" he said protectively.  
"Aye, aye, married" she carried on for him.  
"How do ye ken that?" he asked, but then realized the stupidity of his query.

"Dougal said. Newly married. Although that would be no concern if it wouldna be for the other thing" she answered his ask anyway.  
"And that would be?" Jamie frowned.  
"The in love part" she leaned all the way back in her seat, surveying him again and smiled "you inquired, earlier, how I kent to leave you alone?  
Well dear, red-fox, I saw ye coming from the stables, marching here as if it was your path to the gibbet.  
No man marches such into a whore house"

"I meant no disrespect" Jamie hastened to say.  
"None was taken as such" she laughed so un-disconcertingly.

"Aye, I saw you march here to your doom, but still ye held glowing eyes for the remembrance of another in your head"

"How can ye-?" but Jamie stilled, thinking he was done wi' silly inquiries while addressing such a specialist. 

"When one takes his love further than the bedroom walls, even when she is nowhere to be seen.  
If one carries her with him where he goes" she looked straight into his eyes but seemed to reach his soul "Aye, those kind ye no see coming here"  
then she looked deeper into him.  
"Although it is quite difficult to break, it can be done though!"

As if planned, a low grown and a high pitched wine came from a door to their left.  
Obviously a man at his most vulnerable stage of the proceedings.  
That made her smirk.

"See? the marriage part gets broken twice a day, nay twice an hour here. But the love part, aye, very tricky that one"  
she smirked again  
"Besides I Ken the look of a well-kept, well satisfied man when I see one.  
That with the love is a hard thing to break"

She leaned to him, as if to force him to speak only truth.  
"She is good to you then?"

At the mention of Claire a broad grin escaped Jamie's lips, he couldna help it.  
Lord he missed her.

The Madam, that Jamie was learning, verra weel, was no ordinary whore or Madam, relaxed and inclined back in her seat sighing  
"Aye, the love part that's no easily broken, can be done though"

"No, I dinna think so" Jamie said still holding to his dumb grin, remembering that long white swan neck when it is fully exposed.  
Reminiscing of the time when Claire laid on her stomach and her curls were still pinned up, for he wouldn't even give her time to properly undress herself, before entering the chamber, closing the door behind him, grabbing her by her nape with one hand, relieving her of all her clothes with the other, lying her on the bed wi' her rear to him and took her.

Niall eyed him, as if making her mind whether to pick up the challenge he inadvertently placed in her lap.  
apparently she did-  
"Does she love ye then? Truly love's ye?" she asked 

What's your meaning?" Jamie startled.

"I ken the look of a man satisfied and in love" she said "But I also ken the look of a man still craving something he doesna truly own"  
"And ye find such a look in me?"  
"Aye" she said, laying down her facts and coming to her conclusions.  
"Now if you are married, in love, satisfied and no seeking another, than something in the lady is missing, something you want mended"

He looked squarely back at this lass's eyes, trying to make up his mind whether to proceed.

Her with her fine clothes, black wavy hair and a complexion that told she was of mixed race.  
He recollected her high speech, wise words, which were all wrapped in a clear, French, accent but still spoke some Scot, to make her patrons feel at home.

Jamie also considered that they were alone, in a fully occupied brothel, which meant all the men and women were behind closed doors and listening to what Jamie might or might nay say was the furthest thing from their mind.

Why he could kindle himself on fire and by the sounds around him, none will care.

And here before him sat a connoisseur of all man and woman issues.  
And the truth did weigh on him greatly.

He at least could ease his mind and soul, as with every confessor he went to.  
Or by some miracle, he might actually get some answers to his burning questions.  
The woman was an obvious expert in her field. 


	3. Chapter 3

"I dinna Ken if she truly loves me" he simply said, finally voicing his biggest fear "at times I think she does and at times she... weel she disappears ye Ken?"  
"Disappears?" it was Niall turn to be rapt.

"Aye. She could be wi' me, look at me in a way I would see wives or lovers when they watch those they love but-"

he sighed wi' sadness and looked at his drink as if the wine was the waters of Avalon and he like king Arthur would ask them to heal his heart's wounds.

Finding none such powers in the wine, he returned his gaze to Niall.

Looking at her as if she was said waters and perhaps held Excalibur, that will insure his win over whatever took his wife away from him, time and again.

"But then" he continued taking a deep breath "It will be gone. SHE would be gone.  
Disappears to places I Ken none of and ha' the feeling I wouldna be able to follow even if I Kent where they were." 

"Your woman holds secrets" Niall said knowingly.

"Aye" he answered wi' a rueful smile and nodded  
"Many. Too many to count and I canna question them or she would run" he added just in case she thought he could.

"Most of the time, I think I would have her with them and live fine alongside them, as long as it meant that I would be living with her as weel. Only-"

"Only she disappears" Niall continued for him.

"Aye" he sighed miserably again.

He had to pretend to cough, for he felt a tear threaten to fall, at the memory of all the feelings that came to him in those moments.  
Those moments that he looked at his new bride, so happy to have ever lived to have her and she would stare into naught, sad and contemplative, as if she had another place to be at, as if she had another one to be with.

"Seeking another place, time or another man, I dinna ken, whatever it is, 'tis nay me".  
Jamie averted his eyes from Niall, thinking.  
Claire gave him such joy when she was wi' him, but he must be failing to do so, if she would go where she went.

"When I touch her, even lightly she is wi' me truly" he hastened to explain, to protect his wife's name and kind-heart.  
"When I talk to her, she inclines not just her body to me, but her heart and soul; always smiles and talks back.  
When I tell her my heart, she holds my words as precious jewels, for guarding, for caring, for Mending.  
All that I could ever need or dream to ha' someone give me and treat me so"

"And when she leaves?" Niall queried.

"I canna reach her then" Jamie said miserably "I must wait 'till her return, to catch her and take her back to me".

He felt awkward admitting the next part, but to whom better than a whore could one tell such things.  
"When I'm inside her, she is mine and no one else or naught else can reach and take her away from me" 

"Are ye sure?" Niall asked  
He looked at her bewildered

"I mean no offence of course, ma chérie" she hurried to explain "'tis only a woman's legs **can** be opened and not compel her heart or mouth to do the same. Despite what most men think"

"I Ken that just fine. But nay" He smiled knowing his next words to be the truth  
"I see… nay, I can FEEL the difference" he said with no doubt in his mind "Under me"  
Or atop of me, he added smiling to himself  
"The lass is mine. Truly nay uncertainty 'obout that"

"And are ye asking me, how to keep it so?" Niall asked, nay wi'oot sympathy.

"Aye" he said hopefully "who better to ask how to seduce a person heart wi' his body?"  
He smiled and she returned his kind smile back but then sobered.

"I canna tell ye Jamie" she frowned from the thinking "Ye have a rare one"  
She determined what Jamie knew already quite well.  
"One that will no fall at a man's feet only because he tells her or orders her so.  
No by the power of the arm or nay by the bound of the church do lassies such as those bend"

She considered the matter a few more moments and asked  
"As she ever seen ye with other lassies?" 

She startled him wi' that and she hurriedly explained "If no during the marriage then perhaps before?"  
she leaned in close  
"See sometimes, what is given so generously might be easily relinquished in one's mind. If she Ken that she might lose ye or your love..."

"She willna" Jamie protested vehemently.

"So ye say and could be true, but she doesna have to Ken that truth now does she?" Niall suggested shrewdly.

"She has seen me kissing one lass, before the marriage that is" he said smiling against himself, at the memory of Claire lowering her gaze wi' shame when she peeked to the alcove where he held and kissed Laoghaire.

"Ye liked that she saw ye?" said Niall interpreting the look of him correctly.  
"Weel, 'twas only that-" Jamie stuttered at his words.

"Ye wanted her to see ye as a man and nay a puppy"  
He could feel his eyes pop out from astonishment of how much this woman kent men's mind.

"Aye" he admitted "although she did tease me greatly for it"  
"Means she was jealous, that is bien" Niall determined

"Listen young man, perhaps ye should use my services"  
"What?" Jamie gawped.  
"Aye, ravish some lassies have them treat ye as a God, let them cry out your name in ecstasy, even take a few at a time" Niall generously suggested.  
"It will take out some of the admiration ye have for your lady, knock her off the pedestal ye put her on" she smiled broadly at her found salutation to his problem.  
"That way ye could put her back in her place when ye return to her.  
Maybe then she will return to you and stay. I've seen it happen so"

For one short moment Jamie considered it, Niall obviously kent what she talked of and he so badly wanted to feel enough for someone.

Only he kent he wanted to feel enough in HER eyes, he wanted to be enough for HER, nobody other. 

At this moment Jamie also realized that when Laoghaire came and offered herself to him, after they returned to Leoch, He was tempted for the same reason these Madam's word spoke to him now.

Laoghaire looked at him as a MAN!  
She thought him enough in any aspect that one considered and was willing to lose her own maidenhood and to be regarded as mere mistress to him, if it meant she could have him.

All a while his own wife scorned and belittled him and his authority of her.  
His marreit right authority over her.

Her acerbic face, angry eyes and the tight lip silence she ignored him wi', were humiliating, especially for the fact that they all could see them and watched them and mocked him.

At the time he also thought he might never get her back, even to what they were before, for he kent that after their reconciliation they did reach a better bonny place.

And aye, damn the blasted wench of a beastie he called a wife, he was a MAN.  
He wanted to be treated as such, especially for all he's done for her.  
He risked his life, went to the darkest place he has ever been at- Fort William- for Christ sake, where he was flogged and where his own father-  
He couldna finish that thought.

He was also a man who had just discovered how good it felt to bed a lass and wanted more.  
When he looked at Laoghaire and felt her breast and skin at his palm, he also wanted to know!

Ever since he touched Claire, he tried to think of others he touched and found them lacking.

Not as her, none felt like her.

She felt like… he could never dream of such a feeling. 

It was more than the touching itself; she ignited in him something he never knew existed before.  
It was happiness to hold her.  
All could go and be wrong, but when they touched, he was blessed, happy and content.

But the bedding, he had never bed another.  
Would it feel the same? He wondered, hearing from Laoghaire what she offered.

He was also angry at the hold Claire had on him.  
It dinna matter to him before, for he wanted to stay under that hold forever.  
But when it was taken away and when she treated him so-  
As a dog and no her husband.

Aye, then he wanted freedom of her control over him.  
Then he wanted to ken that he could be liberated from her clutches.

For he dinna feel like a man, when she was mad at him.  
He felt as if he wished to beg at her feet for her forgiveness, nay matter the reason for the fight.  
He dinna want to be mad at her.  
Even what he just said, the names he called her, it hurt him to even think such things of her and he wanted to ask her forgiveness for ever thinking of her such, even wi'oot him speaking them to her.

Aye, he dinna feel as a men, but a servant, which only desired to beg for her to take him into her arms again.

So he was tempted at the offer that Laoghaire tried again and again for him to take.

But when he stood there, Laoghaire breast at his palm, her lips craving and inching to his,  
he realized the same thing he would tell this tempting Mistress now.

"I nay doubt ye ha' seen every truth a man can possibly hold in his heart, mind and other parts o'him" Jamie said as answer to her offer.  
She made a verra successful Scottish noise, reinforcing his words.

"So 'twill come to nay surprise to ye that I follow one ye must Ken" he smiled cannily. 

"And what is that my love struck pup?" she asked seeming intrigued by what he might say.

"A man does EVERYTHING he does for one reason and one reason alone"  
Jamie said as she tilted her heid nodding for him to explain.

"A man chooses either to go right or left according to one thing Madam and ye o'all of us Ken that verra weel"

"And what is that my beautiful red- head lad?" she smiled shrewdly, accepting his acknowledgment of her wisdom and knowledge.

"Whatever makes him feel good" Jamie determined simply.

"And this helps your case how? How does this 'truth' settle matters for ye and your love one?" she inquired, but also by all means dinna argue wi' his statement.

" **Nothing in my entire life has ever felt as good as this woman** "

And he dinna only mean the bedding.

"And I willna ha' it be endangered, taken away or betrayed, most of all no by me!  
So-"

He raised his cup of verra good wine in salute to her and said

"Do dheagh shlainte, but that is all I offer ye as regard to my wishes and that is all I take from ye as service"

He emptied his cup, rose to his feet and went back to the stables to await until 'dear old uncle' Dougal had his fill wi' whores and secrets.

He had already reached his quota for the night.


End file.
